Do You Write about Me?

I wish I could read your diary
and see the words you’ve written about me in confidence
I wish I could read your mind 
and hear the thoughts you think of me 
knowing 
no one will hear. 

Do you yearn for my presence?
Do you crave my attention?

Could you fill up a book with words about me?
Could you stand in front of a crowd reading poetry,
with my actions as your inspiration
my words as your muse. 
If I asked you to read me one,
which one would you pick?

I just wish I knew what you wanted to say. 
I wish you’d pour your heart out to me
with full vulnerability and no shame. 
You’re so afraid to say the truth
for fear freezes your brain. 
I’m desperate to read the pages that you’ve filled up with my name.
You’re so afraid that what you feel might push me away. 
If only you knew that your truth would make me stay. 

I wonder if you write about me. 
I really hope you do. 
I wonder if you write about me
because I always write about you.